How Many Doses of Crazy am I?

I don't know what I did to make the world hate my guts lately, but it seems like everyone and everything is going against me lately. (Poor me....Somebody bring out the violin and play the sad song, once again...I'm having one of those days.)  I am still fucking sick, so my body is going against me and trying to die or some shit, my husband seems to hate me lately and is making me cry everyday, while he goes out and has fun with his friends and leaves me alone, SICK, with the kids....Work is a whole other story, and it seems like no matter what I do, or no matter what I say to try to help somebody with, "it's wrong" and the vibes I get from people, concerning me, aren't too friendly. What the fuck have I done? Should I just crawl up in a ball and eat some pig shit, hope I get the swine flu (well, at this rate, that's probably what I already have that is making me so sick), and die? Holy shit!

I hate being so negative..Really I do. I am usually the type of person who tries to be strong for everyone else, and tries to be happy in those moments of sadness, because I know that struggles bring strength and shit like that. Well, right now, I really don't care about all of that. I'm sick as hell. My ears hurt so bad, it feels like somebody rammed an icepick in them, and with every breeze that goes by my ear, the intensity of the pain is so bad, that it literally brings me to tears....

"Go to the doctor."  I would, but that would mean having to miss work..... "Go the the E.R."...Shit...If you knew the E.R. in my town, you wouldn't be saying that. I was going to go to the urgent care center this morning, but Bryan left to go call people for work or something stupid, and was gone a majority of the morning, when I could have gone to urgent care. (Wow. I'm sure making him sound like an asshole in this blog.....Way to go, me!)

You know, sometimes a girl just has to vent. Sorry.....A girl with a blog, who doesn't really care what others think, can be be dangerous. And when she's currently sponsered by Tylenol Cold and Sinus, Nyquil, Benadryl, and boxes of kleenex, then it can get ugly....