B ( . ) ( . ) B

I remember after my mom had her mastectomy done, and what her chest looked like...Yea, I was young, and boobs weren't a big deal to me back then, and I just remember her having one breast and then a big scar on the other side where another breast should have been. I also remember her having this little "chicken cutlet" thing (well, to be politically correct, I should call it a prosthesis, but for my sake, I'll call it a chicken cutlet because that's what it looked like), to put in her bra, to fill out the missing part of her. I was a young, strange girl, (my dad used to call me a "space cadet" ) and sometimes, I would get that chicken cutlet, put it in my shirt, and examine my profile in the mirror....I had A boob. One boob. If only I knew the trouble that breasts were back then, I wouldn't have been lusting for them so badly......

Now I'm sure if one of my brothers would have walked in on me checking myself out with this fake boob under my shirt, I probably would still be getting shit from them....But here I am today, spilling it all out on the world wide web for all to read, and it's interesting.......In a couple of months, I will be the one losing both of my boobs...Granted, I am the one making the decision to lose my breasts...It's not like I have to have this surgery.....But let me put it in perspective for you:

*If you knew that the car you bought had an 87%-95% chance of the breaks going out and killing you, would you buy it?
*If you knew that you had an 87%-95% chance of dying if you left your house tomorrow, would you leave your house at all?
*If you knew that there was an 87%-95% chance that the plane you get on was going to crash, would you still get on it?
*If you knew that you had an 87%-95% chance of getting breast cancer by the time you're fifty, would you just sit back and HOPE you catch it in time????????

The last question is one that many of us with this gene mutation have to fight with....It's a hard one.  Sure, technology is bad-ass now and can catch even the smallest tumors/changes in breast tissue, but do you want to take that chance of  "I hope they can catch it in time?" Hell no, not me.

Here is my personal take on it: I want to be in control of the situation. Not the cancer...I don't ever want cancer to have any kind of control over me or my family EVER!  By having a prophylactic bilateral mastectomy, this will reduce my chances of getting cancer by 90%!  Yes, it's a drastic measure to take, but I am more than willing to do it, because I am the one saying "Do it", instead of someone saying, "You have to have a mastectomy because you have cancer."  Because if that was the case, the cancer would have the control. I don't want that mother fucker to have any power over me. Like I have said before, I don't want my children to have to even be introduced to cancer. This is why I'm doing it. 

Yeah, I know there are some out there thinking to themselves, "WTF! Why is she cutting her perfectly, wonderful, beautiful, perky, breasts off? "  (Yes, I am being sarcastic. My boobs are way off from being perfect, wonderful, beautiful and perky!)  But seriously.  All I can say is that I watched my mother, my best friend, my hero, die in front of my eyes because of this horrible disease. Breast cancer is something that steals beautiful women away from the world.  All I can say to those of you who may not support my decision, or may think I am being dramatic, is WHY WOULDN'T I DO THIS?