"DULT" Content



Brooke, my precious little girl. Taken 11/6/10



Last night, my little girl was taking a bath with me, (she's only 4 and I'm all about time management, so if she can take a bath/shower with me to save some time, then why not?), and she takes a look at my weird, nippleless foobs and says, "Mommy, I don't wanna be DULT."  Dult? I asked her what she meant....She said, "I don't wanna be dult and hafta get my nipples cut off like you." Whoa....

That's heavy stuff there...For a 4 year old...She was telling me that she doesn't want to be an ADULT, because she doesn't want to have to get her breasts removed like mommy (me).  Wow, again. I just about busted out crying.

Obviously, I told her that she doesn't have to worry about that, and shouldn't worry about that at all, and then she said, "But Grandma Candy (my mom) gave you the bad stuff in your boobies, and now you give me the bad stuff?" WHOA!!!!

Where is she getting this stuff?  Why is she worrying about these things? She's only 4! Like I have said before, Bryan and I keep the details and "scary" stuff away from our kids. We don't talk about all of this BRCA stuff in front of them, but if they have questions, I explain to them as gently and as best I can without scaring them, or causing them to worry. (Because this is what my parents did with my brothers and me when my mom was going through all of her treatments and stuff....And plus, in my opinion, kids should be kids and shouldn't have to worry about adult things....EVER.) So for Brooke to say these types of things to me, that she doesn't want to grow up because she is scared about having to have her boobies removed, I just about feel like the lowest form of a mother on earth.

Maybe she overheard me talking to someone about my surgery, or about why I had to have my breasts removed......Maybe she realizes that she is a girl and will have boobies one day, and just made the connection......But either way, she is already scared.....And it makes me cry. It makes me feel awful that she is already scared.

I hope that by the time she is old enough to get tested for the BRCA gene, that there is a cure for breast cancer, and that she really doesn't have to worry. As a mother of a daughter that carries that 50% possibility of carrying my BRCA2 mutation, my hopes and prayers are that "they" really do find a cure for breast cancer. I don't want her to worry. Not now, not then.